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Run To God

I like this song, it was written by Jenn and for me it depicts a sole reliance on God, especially when we fail. So I sang it as a song of surrender to God and I really want to see him work in my life.

You can download it here. Enjoy!

Run To You
Give me a confidence
To face each passing day
A chance to see Your pow'r
At work in everyway
Do not be far from me
In times my witness fails
But keep me near the cross
Aand guide me while I'm here

The prodding in my heart
Reveals a hunger in my soul
The life You gave I dare not waste
Cos it's not my own
Grant me the strength to trust
In You in everything I do
Let every action, thought
And word draw me to You

To You
I’m sorry
I fell when I tried
But I failed
So I run to You

I Love Jesus

I didn't know how else to title it, but there's this gurgling geyser in me that wants to burst forth for God!

I had a good time walking home from my bus stop home and I was praying and praying, talking to God like I really miss a long lost lover. God is a lover, in fact, he is the Lover.

Lover not in the sense of a human lover, he is the provider of life! Did you know that you're alive whether because he keeps you alive? It doesn't matter if you like him, love him or hate him, you are here only because of his grace.

I was thanking God for his sovereign grace, that grace that opened my heart to spiritual truths, the grace that kept me alive while I was an unbeliever, the grace that keeps me going on even when I'm downright tired running this race, grace that keeps me waking up each morning, grace that keeps my heart pumping and my lungs from collapsing.

How can anyone say that God doesn't love them?!

I have recently took Pastor MacArthur's advice to read my a book in my Bible daily, for 30 days and by the end of a month I'd have read it 30 times! And as he recommended, I'll be reading the 1st epistle of the Apostle John! So here is a famous saying by Saint John:

"We love because he first loved us" - 1st John 4:19

Never say or think for a second that God does not love you!

Demon Hunter's Deterioate

I need a heart that carries on through the pain
When the walls start collapsing again
Give me a soul that never ceases to follow
Despite the infection within

I am so angst-ridden. SO!

A most wonderful birthday

My friends, I had the most enjoyable birthday in my life up till now, this, today, this evening, man it was enjoyable, surprise after surprise, elating, simply wonderful.

Let me recount the events of the events leading up to today, and to this wonderful day itself.

Wednesday Night - D Day -1

I was at worship practice with my worship team and while practising Sam blurted out, "Sorry I can't be with you at your thing tomorrow" and I was like, OH NO! I'm not supposed to hear that and I was a little disappointed that my surprise's cover was blown!

But! Sharon with her amazing acting managed to convince me that the only surprise was at Botak Jones in the afternoon for lunch with Joel and that all Samantha was saying that she would miss the lunch event.

Of course I didn't believe Sharon lah! But again, Sharon's amazing acting made me feel bad about expecting too much so I believed her that Sam was actually talking about that lunch at Botak Jones.

Besides I am a really simple guy and I am pleased easily most times! Really k! And so I went home and still didn't feel like it was my birthday even though I did get well wishes from various friends, most notably Joey, because he called and wished me! Thank you bro.

Thursday - D Day

The morning began slowly with Sharon buying hotcakes from Macdonalds and we watched a little bit of The Princess Hours 2, the korean tv serial and it sort of set the tone for the day, like you know, slow moving and stuff.

Somehow Sharon was tasked to pre-order our food for lunch at Botak Jones and I think she had such a hard time trying not to ordering as the person on the other side of the line wasn't making it easy. She was ordering for 5 persons and I was only expecting 3, Joel, Sharon and myself.

But I couldn't make out how many she was ordering so she did a good job masking it up convincing me thoroughly that this was the only surprise there was!

After that, we moved to Botak Jones and had lunch. When we got there, Jeremy called Sharon and I saw his name flashing, then I thought, "Eh something fishy is happening, how come Jeremy is calling Sharon?", haha I didn't think too much about it and we were the first to get there and there was no one to say surprise to me.

We picked a four-seater and Sharon was showing I dunno, funny faces? Then I just try to be funny and sat down, then lo and behold! The Botak Jones staff came by with 5 sets of cutlery and said "5 people right?", poor Sharon had no choice but to just nod her head, wahahaha, and I seeing how comical it was let out a big cackle and proceeded to a bigger table.

We sat there for 5 minutes and Joey and Daniel came from behind me and pinched my ear and wished me happy birthday, that was nice! Hahaha, I meant the wishing and that Daniel and Joey were there, and Joel joined us shortly and Botak Jones is good! Hahaha GOOD STUFF! Go try it.

After lunch, we rushed our way down for the 130pm of the screening of Step Up, which Joel keeps calling "Step Up In Faith" but the rest kept hearing "Step Up in Fame", haha, Joel I think the speech pathology course was a mighty good choice! Hahaha. Jokes aside, the film was well shot, good sound track, great dancing! However, the actors weren't good, and the plot was very predictable. I still enjoyed the show though, it makes me feel good and wanting to go for dance classes!

After the movie, we were supposed to go grab a drink and it was pouring really heavily! Sharon for some strange reason had to rush off to church to "collect something from Sister Poh Suan" and we had to go quickly, I was wondering what could be so important. She brought me there and instead of heading to Sister Poh Suan's cubicle we went to the music equipment cubicle and picked up my guitar, effects and some cymbals!

I was baffled and expecting to take a cab to Esplanade where I would play my concert of a lifetime to 5 million people, hahaha, that however, was not what happened. I was headed to Sound Bites for a surprise jam session and Sharon assured me that it was only a jam session and it wasn't anything more than that, I believed her.

Jason, Jeremy, Jeraldine and Daniel appeared! It felt just like old times, not so long ago, but it was good stuff, we jammed through the whole of "So This Is Goodnight EP" and some covers, Daniel had even designated which parts of the song I was to sing but it never occur to me what was going to happen. So I get to do something I love on my birthday and I thought that was great! And I was already happy and content being out with Sharon, but of course she had other plans!

We finished jamming at six plus and Jason drove us to Holland Village where we were going to have dinner at Sushi Tei. I somehow felt like I wanted to go there for dinner, somehow for some strange reason. Sharon did not have to coax me at all! The ride there was funny, Jon, Jeremy and myself in the back of the van, crushing one another. Haha..

When we got to Holland Village, Sharon needed to withdraw money and some strange force just made me follow her and the rest proceeded to Sushi Tei to find seats, right... Haha and we headed there after Sharon withdrew money, and she only withdrew $20 and I thought, "Wah she's going budget..." Hahaha...

When we got there, the manager asked if we had a reservation under Sharon and I was like, "NOOOO!! NOT AGAIN!!" and I stomped up the stairs sulking about how my surprises keep getting messed up, lol, but I didn't know what to expect anyway.

When I went upstairs, lo and behold (you'll keep reading this phrase I think), a whole bunch of my friends were there! WAH! And they wished me a really loud happy birthday! Super!

It was super, receiving the best gift yet, a group of my friends surprising me with their presence and I get to have dinner with them in my favourite Japanese restaurant. Mummy treated everyone and that was my good gift from my parents, I am so thankful to God for such loving parents! (I was initially upset that they didn't really ask me out for dinner) oops! What a fool I was!

As dinner finished, everyone started going off and it was all very natural, I tell you, Step Up's directors should have got my friends to act in their movie, they did such a good job acting as if they had to go off naturally, my parents grabbed my guitar and left, and I was left with Sharon and she said that she wanted to head to Cold Storage and get some candy?! She even went to the pet shop and wanted to check out the rabbits?! All this for what?! To stall time for me!

Then after buying the stuff she wanted to go to Wala Wala? I was like? HUH!? I thought Starbucks would've been a better idea but Sharon said they had one for one and it was good, so I acquiesced and thought to myself the night is not ended!

She rushed me and we paid for the drinks quickly and I saw the same people who were at Sushi Tei were seated and waiting for something to happen! Fwah! It was unreal man, that moment. I took it all and I can still see it now. My guitar was set up and I was to take the stage?! That was just great man! My 5 million concert!

Sharon even planned it in such a way for me to practise with the band without making it obvious! Is that solid planning or what? All in what, 3 days?! She rocks my toe socks off!

So I rocked with Daniel, Jeremy, Caleb, and Joey, and the we sang some originals and a some covers, it was great! Because why? I had practised earlier! Man.

After the set, they sang me a birthday song and Sharon was holding my cake and I blew out my 22 candles! It was wonderful, the joy in my heart, so nice and warm and fuzzy. I love you Sharon.

Thanks also to Cheryl Chan for the cake, it was very yummy, my favourite cake from Secret Recipe, the chocolate banananana cake!

It's still so vivid now and I just wanted to type it all down and savour the moments I had. Some pictures are already on Jon's Flickr, see it at http://www.flickr.com/photos/vii_haven/sets/72157594367907712/

Finally the blow by blow account of the day's events all down, now for the reflections..

You know what I felt at the dinner? I felt that I am so undeserving, how come these people love me so much and will grace me with their presence, how come God loves me so much and chose to bless me and give me great friends who love me? And then at the gig, how come?

You know what this whole celebration of my birthday reminds me of? It reminds me of God's grace poured out so abundantly over my life! Grace O Lord, your kindness is amazing.

I was thinking that man, celebrations are a waste of time and resources, then I saw and savoured tangibly the blessings and grace of God and my being cries "God, you get the glory!". This surely hasn't been a waste of time, and it was a foreshadow of how God delights and sings over me with love, I just am so blessed and loved, in a way that I never knew was possible.

I want to thank you, my friend, brother or sister, for gracing my evening, taking time of your busy schedules of exams and stuff and coming for this event and making it so wonderfully special to me.

I want to thank you my brothers for helping Sharon, planning, brainstorming with her, playing in the band with me, teching me for the guitars, thank you Joey, Joel, Daniel, Jeremy, Ricky, Caleb, Jon, thank you brothers.

I want to thank my family, my mummy and papa for loving me unconditionally even though I'm SUCH A HEADACHE! I know, I cannot stand myself sometimes. I wanna thank Jared, my cousin for taking time to show that he loves me, thank you cuz, brother.

I wanna thank my darling girlfriend Sharon, for putting hours, sleepless nights and cracking her brains to put this whole thing together, I'm going to have a hard time outdoing you, but I will try, just you see! I love you bi!

Lastly but surely not the least, I wanna thank God for working so marvelously in this whole party thingie, for allowing me to perform at Wala Wala, for holding the rain when we had to go and get the guitar, for sending the buses and the cabs when we needed them, for giving me wonderful parents, for giving me a super girlfriend who loves me so-h, and for friends who bless me and love me unreservedly, even though I do not deserve it, and Lord for you, for loving me in such a real and powerful way, in ways undeniable even if I was the densest numbskull, I would know that you, my God loves me.

And in typical Polaroid Show fashion, I leave you with this verse:

1 Corinthians 10:31
Whether, then, you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.
Praise the Lord, Soli Deo Gloria! To God be all the Glory!

PS: Strangely, but beautifully, Martin Smith is singing in my speakers, "To God in Heaven be the Glory!" Cool or what?! HalleluJah!

Everyone Doesn't Wait

It is said time and tide waits for no man, well, add to the list Borders Bookstore waits for no man too!

I spent one day to think about whether to take the job at Borders, decided that it was the best deal for me now, and then I find out that the posts have been taken! ARGH.

Brothers Who Encourage Me to Fight On

Friends, thanks for reading, I mean I know I haven't been updating and all. Yup. Been slack and free, so I didn't update.

This my friends are brothers in Christ whom I listen to when I am feeling tempted, they encourage me to "lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us and ... run with endurance the race that is set before us" (Hebrews 12:1b)

They may be grinding their vocals and you can't hear the words, but the content they are singing has to be at least shouted, when they don't scream they play a nice rock ballad.

Everytime I listen to the song Undying and read the lyrics along with them, I feel a sense of uplifting in my soul and strength to fight on!

Here's that portion of words..

Tearing through these days I find the tolerance to strive and push on
I know what lies beyond this life for me is already won
No one can take away the blood that covers over my fall
Without the blood of perfect life I know I’m nothing at all
So now I reign forever hallowed in eternity’s hand
No man can shake me from the everlasting ground that I stand

- Undying by Demon Hunter

You can check out their songs at http://www.purevolume.com/demonhunter and read an interview here: http://www.wisemenpromotions.com/interviews/demonhunter.htm/ enjoy and be uplifted!

Don't hide your broken heart behind a smile

Pragmatism in the Church

I am not as moved now as I used to be by the tyranny of the urgent and by the need to respond to every trendy view that blows across the cultural sea in America. Well past midlife, I have a deep confidence that the best way to be lastingly relevant is to stand on rock-solid, durable old truths, rather than jumping from one pragmatic bandwagon to another. - John Piper (26/04/1998)

It's alarming that the church today sometime undiscerningly jump onto so-called "christian" movements just because the majority is raving about it and because statistics show it raking in the numbers.

Since when has the numbers game been in play in the case of religion? Is not quality more important than quantity?

The Old Things Passed Away

2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come.

Before I became a Christian, I had a lot of pre-conceived notions and beliefs. For example I believed that the myths about ghosts and hungry ghosts festival and things like that, but now I don't, largely because they are not biblical.

On the other hand there are biblical ghosts and we know that spirits do exist.

For me it's been a sanctifying of my mind, revamping, sort of, my mind with compliance to the Word of God. We must shed the old things and leave it behind, we shouldn't keep half-truths or falsehoods stuck in our head, including worldly attitudes and superstitions. Shed it, drop it, replace it with the truths of God!